“Trust that it is ok to put your needs first. You deserve to take care of yourself.”
– Danielle Koepke
Have you ever wondered why it is such a struggle to make yourself a priority?
I used to struggle with this immensely, and I know I am not the only one.
This is a common theme for many of the women that I coach, and for many women all over the world.
It doesn’t matter what race, religion, culture, or background a women is born into, this disempowering ‘limiting belief’ of ‘other people are more important than me’, that plays within the background of our subconscious minds and reminds us repeatedly to put ourselves on the bottom of our priority list, that our needs don’t matter, that it is selfish to put ourselves first, has been handed down from generation to generation, and is so deeply embedded within our psyche, that it often goes unnoticed until we reach our breaking point, feeling so stressed, overwhelmed, exhausted, and burnout with nothing let to give, that we finally begin to go in search of a better way to feel.
Have you ever felt this way?
Last night, I was in a Subconscious Imprinting Session with one of my highly empathic, beautiful clients, who came to the session wanting to work on setting healthy boundaries and was curious about why she struggled to say ‘NO’ and allowed herself to be an emotional dumping ground for the better part of her life.
Through the muscle testing & questioning process, it was revealed that she was holding onto generational beliefs and thought patterns passed onto her from her family and religious upbringing that were running her life and were at the core of why setting healthy boundaries and making herself a priority was such a struggle for her.
Beliefs such as:
‘I have to do what is pleasing to my family and to the church, even if it means I have abandoned myself’
‘It is not ok to be selfish’
‘If I think differently, I must be wrong’
‘I have to be submissive & subservient, don’t question … just do what I am told’
‘My needs don’t matter’
‘I am only of value when I am serving others, even if I am drowning & have nothing left to give’
She has spent the better part of her life believing that ‘other people are more important than her’, and I could so relate to her story, can you?
No wonder it felt like a challenge to set boundaries when she was taught that It wasn’t ok to have them!!
It isn’t until we take a stand for ourselves and for each other, woman to woman, challenging this systemic belief, that we can begin to dismantle this paradigm and finally break free to unapologetically fill our cup & serve from the overflow, rather than from an empty vessel.
Throughout the session, I guided her to release this conditioned programming, and adopt new, empowering beliefs that would give her permission to have her needs met, to be a top priority in her life, and that its not wrong to want things for herself.
I asked her this question, ‘What if being selfish is not a wrongness? What if it I ok to empower yourself, say no to things that don’t fill your cup (without the guilt), and choose greater for yourself & for your life, so you can then empower others to do the same?’
From this space of new awareness, she was able to see herself in a new light.
Her new, empowering beliefs became:
‘We are all important, including me.’
‘It is ok to chart my own path, take a stand for myself, do what is best for me and find balance in my life.’
‘It’s not my responsibility to take on other peoples stuff’
‘I am the most important person in my life.’
With these new beliefs embedded into her subconscious, she will now be more aware & better able to discern what is best for her, while setting healthy boundaries with less resistance & greater ease.
Supporting her in acknowledging her worth has me so excited to see where this takes her!!
If you are ready to stop letting past patterns stand between you and the life you deserve, If you want to feel balanced, whole, worthy, and FREE … then this is my invitation to connect.
I offer a free 30-45 minute Connection Call, to see where you are at, where you want to be, and if coaching with me is a vehicle that can help get you there with greater speed.
Learn more about coaching with me by scheduling a free Connect Call here.
Lots of love,
Marci is helping thousands of women who are entering the next chapter of life, find their voice, reclaim their passion, find balance and create a meaningful life they love by using online education, courses, and 1-1 coaching.